This blog is a perfect example - I started it what, like nine months ago, and until yesterday hadn't posted for six. Oops. I find myself often starting a project, and then getting distracted or frustrated so I move onto something else. With my blog, I've wanted to change the name almost from the beginning - I'm planning to be mom to another little kiddo someday and I'm more than just mom, right? But I can't think of anything witty/creative/perfect so instead I kind of just gave it up all together. Well, that and shortly after my last post in February I started working part-time from home, which translated to "if Mack was sleeping I was working."
We've now been in our house for just about a month, and there is still plenty to do around here. We got all of the big stuff done within the first week and have been steadily working on the rest ever since. Now we're mostly down to decorating and organizing the crap-that-I-don't-really-know-what-to-do-with-but-can't-get-rid-of. And this is where I become horribly indecisive because I can't figure out the perfect thing so I just shut down and find something else completely unproductive to do instead.
Ryan's been out of town for work for several days each of the last two weeks, so I've made long lists of things to work on (during Mack's naps and at night) around here to keep me busy, otherwise those days really drag by. I've been able to accomplish quite a bit - including locking myself out of the house (apparently having had a key the whole time, but that's a story for another time) and draining my car battery (thankfully in the garage). Yeah, I'm awesome like that :)
Yesterday I decided it was time to finally tackle my "office." I'm starting to think it wasn't the best idea to make this the first room people see when they walk in. It's been a bit of a catch-all as we've unpacked and has become quite an eyesore. Once I dealt with all of the random stuff in there (read: moved it to the basement), it was time to get down to business. I have an IKEA bookshelf/desk combo with cubbies for some stuff, but overall not a lot of storage space. And I have a lot of stuff in my office - bills/important papers, tax books/info and work stuff, and all my scrapbook/crafts/sewing junk.
I have four or five different scrapbooks I've completed about a dozen pages in and then promptly moved on to something else. I have several craft/sewing projects partially completed. Some of these are less about being indecisive, and more about my apparent lack of sewing ability...
I'm kind of an embarrassment to my family in that way - all of the women on my mom's side are pretty much awesome seamstresses. Is that still the word to use? I don't know. They can sew good, how about that? Anyway, I'm not exaggerating here. One of my aunt's made my wedding dress and it was beautiful, not an awkward-fitting, home ec project :)
When I sew, I have temper tantrums. Again, not an exaggeration. I made Mack a fabric photo book for Christmas, and at one point had a little rant on facebook about how I'd rather stab myself in the eye with a sewing needle that actually sew with it. A week ago, I tried to sew a simple pillow cover and ended up stomping out to the garage and throwing the whole machine in the trash bin. Really a mature way to handle frustration, huh? Thankfully this awesome behavior was only witnessed by my husband and not my little sponge of a 15-month old.
I have a cheap, old machine so that could be the problem, or it could be that I barely know how to sew in a straight line and have zero ability to trouble-shoot if it's not working properly. I'm going to have to either get a better machine that is idiot-proof or give up sewing all together before my son see me acting like this! I really want to get it figured out, because I have a few dozen projects bookmarked on my computer to work on someday.
But I digress. My point is I have several half-finished sewing projects (now including the pillow cover), that I need to put somewhere. There's also all the left over scraps and supplies from previous somewhat successfully completed projects. Not to mention the really important papers I don't really need, the tax books and class materials I'll never look at again (why look in a book when I can google it?!), and all the other crap that doesn't belong anywhere else either. I just don't know what to do with all this stuff! I love the idea of organizing, but it almost always makes me feel the same way. It just seems to paralyze me, and all of my list-checking-off energy of the past few days is gone. Instead, I find myself watching the Tyra Show, where she has experts answering all the questions about pregnancy that everyone already knows, and having a snack. There was a reason I kept putting this off.
After thinking about it a little more, maybe my problem isn't so much distraction/lack of focus, but more of perfectionism and indecisiveness. I know which types of projects leave me feeling this way, so I avoid them or stop in the middle and find something else to do. Like having Tyra answer all of my undying questions :)
You crack me up! so glad I can follow your blog too.. now I'll make you stick with it! I am the same way as you in a lot of ways. If things are going to be or go the way I think they should I just "shelve" it. I'm not sure I've ever finished anything (to the degree I had intended) I am curently sitting in a room that has half of the trim painted and and half of it waiting to be done. I have so many great ideas but seem to come up short on the follow through. So what's the solution? Do you cut down personal expectations and ideas so that everything is mediocre or keep the same plans and expectations and just find more hours in the day (like cutting out the tyra show lol or for me, biggest loser!)
ReplyDeleteI think it's both cutting down my expectations, and being more productive with my time. The tyra show was a one-time thing - I seriously cannot stand her, but there are other shows that suck me in.
ReplyDeleteI also think that for me it's been helpful to realize that my energy/motivation is kinda ebb and flow, and to accept it and work with it (to a degree - not use it as an excuse to be lazy). There are days when I get sooo much accomplished and the tv never gets turned on during the day. And then there are days when keeping up with Mack and be a good housewife wears me out, and by naptime all I can manage is folding laundry in front of the tv :)
So I've figured that out, but not how to be better on follow through...